Tests of Love

When individuals are unconsciously scared of their own needs they sometimes make up stories and exaggerate the effect that their partner’s weakness’s have on commitment Their partner’s short comings become a bigger deal than need to be. Let’s say you’re looking forward to seeing your partner but he or she is often late. You’re aware that you feel disappointed when it happens but you are unaware that you also feel foolish for being so excited to get together. Then your unconscious mind begins to play games. Instead of merely feeling disappointment, your mind creates devilish stories. “My partner doesn’t care about me. My partner is selfish. I shouldn’t trust. I’m someone who it’s easy to abandon. I hate myself for caring.”
The scared one unfortunately believes it is their partner who is lacking the will, desire or capability to remain stable and close.
The partner who chronically runs late doesn’t want lateness to be the measure of love. “I’ve run late my whole life, it has nothing to do with love. I get that I annoy you by being late. I’m sorry, but I love you as much as I’ve always loved you.”