The difference between love and need

1) If you demand that someone give you positive feelings, that’s need.
2) If you think that the other person should consider your feelings before figuring out his/her own feelings first, that’s need!
3) When you assume that your partner has all the emotional power in the relationship that’s your need to be the child.
4) If you DO NOT believe that your partner has integrity, why are you trying to get emotional supplies from him/her? That’s need – stemming from your own fears of abandonment or worthlessness. Please get your support from people that you respect!
5) Even perfect love won’t cure our human experience of feeling, at times, helpless, alone, and unlovable.
6) It’s normal to feel hurt, sometimes, by the behavior of a partner but if you are repeatedly devastated by the one you love  attempt to figure out what is it in you that is so vulnerable. Yes, you can still place limits on the others’ bad behavior or seek help.
7) Chronic feelings of defeat indicate a power struggle between two people.
8) Learn about yourself. Pick up any book by Pema Chodrin, Eckhard Tolle,
Study yourself through whatever interests you. Try the Enneagram and 9 personality types. Yoga, massage, core energetics, gestalt therapy, mindful meditation and more.
9) Loving is your right and mostly our culture teaches us about longing.
10) Loving well takes conscious effort and you are worth the effort!

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